#MicroblogMondays 37: What’s in a Name?
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Just to make this all about me: I audibly released a sigh of relief when CNN sent out an alert stating the new name of the princess was Charlotte Elizabeth Diana. In other words, not Alice.
Normally I’m only worried about family members scooping one of our names, but in this case, because the name would become a new trend, I equally didn’t want Alice used. Not that Josh would ever agree to the name Alice, but it has always been one of my special names, and I didn’t want to share it with the Princess. I know, ridiculous. But the idea of having to hear my special name paired with this other woman’s baby felt like… too much.
Charlotte, that’s just the name of my notebook.
Inside that notebook is a list of names I always carry with me. And yes, Alice is on the list.
Do you have any special names that you hope no one else — either in your family or famous people outside your family — use?
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| 1. | Sadie | 16. | Mary Francis | 31. | Just Heather |
| 2. | No Baby Ruth | 17. | Isabelle | 32. | S |
| 3. | Jen (Days of Grace) | 18. | apluseffort | 33. | Mali (A Separate Life) |
| 4. | One and Done? | 19. | Solo Mama | 34. | Mali (No Kidding) |
| 5. | Jessica | 20. | Shilpa | 35. | Savannah (Because I Can’t Have Babies) |
| 6. | Middle Girl | 21. | Junebug | 36. | Laurel Regan @ Alphabet Salad |
| 7. | Loribeth (The Road Less Travelled) | 22. | Cristy | 37. | Savannah (Countless Tomorrows) |
| 8. | Lori Lavender Luz | 23. | Infertile Girl | 38. | My Path To Mommyhood (Jess) |
| 9. | Cathy @ Still Waters | 24. | Good Families Do | 39. | Shannon |
| 10. | Unpregnant Chicken | 25. | Jamie | 40. | The bespectacled mother |
| 11. | Rachel | 26. | Kasey | 41. | Journeywoman |
| 12. | Geochick | 27. | deathstar | 42. | Trisha |
| 13. | Parul | 28. | Stephanie (Travelcraft Journal) | ||
| 14. | illustr8d | 29. | Shail | ||
| 15. | Justine | 30. | torthú il |
36 comments
I’ll admit that the choice of our daughter’s name was in no small part influenced by the fact that in our circle of family and friends (not to mention the wider population), it’s very unlikely to be seen again. I grew up with (what seems like) one of the world’s most common girl’s names, and have never quite reconciled that. I’m drawn to names that are very unusual, and think that any of my ‘special names’ (I know just what you mean!), including my daughter’s name had she been a boy, are unlikely to end up anywhere else, barring a random new trend.
Charlotte is actually a special name to me. It was what I named my first car back in 1995 (do kids still do that?) and has sort of taken on a life of its own in many ways. But I wouldn’t ever use it for a child, so I guess Kate and William using it is okay by me.
I loved the name Noah and really pushed for our son to be named that, but my husband didn’t agree. Now it’s gotten more popular here in Spain and I do feel a little twinge when I meet new baby boys named Noah.
Clara. Not that I’ll ever use it now, but I’d rather keep it for my secret thoughts than learn to associate it with someone else’s baby.
Yes but there’s no way I’m sharing – what if someone sees my comment and decides they’re cute? Haven’t you seen that episode of friends??
When my grandfather passed away I decided if I had a boy his middle name would be my grandfather’s name. Of course with sucky infertility I watched as all three of my cousins on that side had 6 kids in the time it took me to get pregnant with one (not a boy). I doubt we will have another, but if we do I definitely want to use it!
I used to keep a short list of names I liked too. I would vary the spellings to make them look unique. If I ever wrote a decent piece of fiction, I would want to use this list.
I think I like weird enough names that I’m not concerned about cousins using the names I like. Top on my list right now are Mercer and Beatrice though if they didn’t fit the child I have more girl names I like (boy names are so hats!).
I have collected what I consider unusal names and name combinations that I’ve run across in my various work personas for use is stories and such.
On a personal side I have loved the names Isadore and Elizabeth. There are 1001 (at least) Elizabeths in the world–including one of my best friends. While Isadore is more rare I don’t feel any sort of “ownership” to the name. I had not considered either when naming my son or daughter.
I would probably have been pissed off if one of my cousins had used Katie for a name. Thankfully, they didn’t, although I’ve heard that someone we attended support group with named their subsequent daughter Katie. :p The other names I had in mind for a subsequent daughter were Amanda Claire & for a boy Michael Vincent Neill.
Alice, by the way, is a very popular name in my extended family (and also one I like). My grandfather had an Aunt Alice — I’m not whether she was specifically named after anyone, but I can think of at least half a dozen other Alice/Alyce/Allysons from that branch of my family who were named after her. I thought the name Will & Kate chose was perfect, paying tribute to various people in both their families, including Prince Charles, the Queen and of course, Diana. To actually call the baby Diana would have been handing the poor kid a lot of baggage, I think, but I was not at all surprised to see it used as a middle name.
I’m not sure I’d be upset if a celebrity used one of “our” names. It’s not like I know them so it wouldn’t feel as personal as if a friend or cousin did it. I find I don’t particularly like some of the names celebrities are using these days, so I imagine they wouldn’t be drawn to the same names I like anyway.
I don’t have special names. I think I used to and I had some favorites that ended up being ridiculously popular so haha on me (Emma, Aiden). Once we started looking for names for our kids those had to be kicked to the curb because one stipulation was that our kids have somewhat unusual names. I had to let go of my favorites a long time ago.
I was upset when a former friend had a baby prior to me and named him Calvin. At that time it was our #1 name. She didn’t know because we didn’t tell anyone, but it was another twist of the infertility dagger.
Alice is lovely. I’m happy for you that the Duchess chose something different.
Charlotte is the name of one of N’s baby dolls. I’ve only known a few Alices in my life, though, and they are all wonderful.
I have one special name, too. A girl. So I know exactly what you mean.
Oh yes, I understand. Our girl name was Hope, and we never got to use it (two boys here). It was my inner mantra during the struggle with infertility, and it was our choice well before we knew we’d have that struggle. It’s also my middle name; for years, I wished I’d chosen to go by that name at some crucial juncture in life when it would be easy to shed one identity and take on another.
Yes. My future son and daughter’s names. When I found out that a pregnant coworker was considering using my son’s name for her baby if it was a girl, I was boiling inside. Not only did she get pregnant first, she managed to want to use that boy name for her girl. She eventually gave birth to a boy and used another name. Phew…
Seven. (kidding, Seinfeld reference). Mine is a secret. Its our never-to-be girl’s name.
Most of my special names (like Geochick said) became so popular that they fell off my special name list. I have one girl name that has always been my favorite – Larissa – which I will probably never get to use but I wouldn’t want anyone close to me to steal it and wouldn’t want it to become really popular.
I was so determined about my girl name I would still have used it even if my own brother had done so before me. It was a popular name 140 years ago, it is in the family, and in my country now more popular than ever. It only makes me happy: the more the merrier!
Boys names are harder for me, I even asked Mel here to help me with it 🙂 and would love to meet some Colms in real life.
I have similar thoughts to Sadie. Names are hard as they hold special meanings. I loved Charlotte, but it was taken early by one of my brother’s friends who had an “oops.” Over time, I began to worry that the names I held dear would be used prior to me getting a chance.
Oddly enough, I made peace with all the other names as a process of resolution. Knowing that we are done makes it easier to hear the other possibilities used. So I can see how this would be hard for you if Alice was used.
I think I’m in the minority where someone close to me using “my” name wouldn’t stop me from using it if we liked it enough. My list of special names has changed over the years based on people I know, and ultimately who I married. I always loved the name Phillip, but do not love how it sounds with Powers. That said Roxanne and Pearl are the two girls names I’ve always wanted to use for middle names, for the girl that will likely never be.
Interesting. Can’t think of any such names that I wouldn’t want others to use.
I definitely have my names I don’t want scooped. Charlotte isn’t one, though. In fact, it’s the name of my niece, whose parents very thoughtfully ran it by us first to make sure it wasn’t on our list. (Awesome, right?!)
Pretty sure that’s who the princess is named after. 😉
My favorite girls’ name is a female variant of the same name we used for my firstborn son, so in a sense, I got to use the name, although I didn’t, exactly. (At least, I wouldn’t use it now, even if I somehow, miraculously, had a daughter because the nickname I’d want to use for it is the same nickname we call my son.)
As some others have said, someone else using “my” name would not have stopped me from using it. Both our sons’ names ended up being in the top 10 baby names for the year they were born, but my husband (who also has a popular name) assured me that having a common name would not scar them for life, and we liked the names, so we still used them.
“Just to make this all about me: I audibly released a sigh of relief when CNN sent out an alert stating the new name of the princess was Charlotte Elizabeth Diana. In other words, not Alice.”
It’s not only you, IT’S ALSO ME. (Guess what AJ’s first initial is.) When we were shortlisting names we avoided top 10 or 50 names. It w as noted that Alice is a more trendy name in the UK than North America, but I was OK with that. I did not foresee a princess potentially having that name! when I heard the rumour all I could think was NOOOOOO NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO NOOOOOOO NOOOOOO!!! The bitter subfertile in me was having a fit: Friggin’ royals should not be able to pop out two babies in two years (or something) have perfect bodies and perfect clothes, have the world rave over them like they are somehow virtuous for being lucky in their biology, AND STEAL THAT NAME! Yes, I have ISSUES!!! LOL. I’m sure I would have gotten over it and been able to laugh at myself eventually, but I was still relieved when I say the name. And glad that AJ won’t grow up with people making comments about it.
^^ second last sentence: “relieved when I HEARD the name, not “say the name.”
This is such a timely post subject for me at the moment. My girl is 5 weeks old and we still don’t have a name for her!!!!!! It is driving me batty! (Please feel free to leave your suggestions on my Microblog post today. I can’t guarantee we’ll use it, but it might just help me/us figure something out.)
As for names I have on my list for years are for a boy: Mason & Julian/Julien. And for a girl: Ayla, Taya, River & Lydia (it is my car’s name, but I could easily forget that if hubby would agree). Either hubby doesn’t like them, or I don’t like the way they would be said in Finnish.
My cousin and I used the same name. (Each with permission.) When they were young, we just added middle names. Now that they’re adults, and very different people, they never see each other. So it wasn’t a problem at all.
Juliet. Sophie.
I am in a really raw place with other people’s babies right now. This post resonates with me on a really deep level.
I hadn’t actually written them down – just carried the list in my heart. But I just wrote them into Athena. Thank you.
xoxo
For a girl, we loved Sophia until it got popular. I was an Amanda in school in the 90s. No popular names allowed!
Our other special favorite, Hannelore, is also taken now. When my wife began transitioning, we knew it was the official end of the stupid hope there would someday be another child to give it to. She took it as her middle name.
It does bother me still that my family’s middle name tradition won’t continue. The eldest daughter’s eldest daughter’s middle name is always Kay. If Tatoe had been a girl, we were going to go with Kay Alice as her middle names. (Alice was my wife’s grandmother’s middle name, and she passed away shortly before we finally conceived Tatoe.)
Interesting – I don’t think I have any special names, so everyone is free to use whatever they want with no offense to me, LOL!
That’s funny, because I’ve always loved Charlotte, but it wasn’t an agreed-upon, approved name on our List. I liked it because my father’s middle name is Charles, and a little girl named Charlie is super cute, in my opinion at least. We have multiple name lists in our fertility notebook, the one that had three sections and I kept one for doctor’s appointment notes, plans, and questions; one for frantically writing down lining thicknesses and follicle measurements and E2 levels; and I kept the last section for fun things like name lists and bedding I liked and things for the nursery and blog post ideas. Our names are kind of sacred, and we have one definite girl name and one definite boy name and a couple runners-up. Not Charlotte, though. I cross my fingers every year that I don’t get a student that will forever haunt a name I love, and last year I had one for our boy name but thankfully I really really enjoyed him and would be honored to have a son with the same name. We shall see what happens with adoption and naming…
My oldest son got the only first name I was ever very attached to. I have a middle name I’d love to use on a girl (a combination of my two grandmother’s first names), but as I can’t possible handle another child without a husband to help (and even then he’d have to be ok with DE or adoption), it’s unlikely I’ll ever use it. It’s surprising how sad I am to miss the chance to honor my two grandmothers.
This is interesting. I have thought hard about it but I am not able to think of any name which I do not want others to avoid naming their loved ones. I have a pretty uncommon name myself still I will not mind someone else also named Anamika.
I have two names (one each for a girl and boy) that are really only known to my husband and I. As I had two pregnancies, and each very different, I like to think I was pregnant with a boy and girl, and these would have been their names. I use them combined as a pseudonym and email address on some blogs, so some people might know them. I’m not saying them here though, they just feel too private.
I thought of your notebook when I heard the news.
I don’t have any special names. I had trouble coming up with the two we had to come up with!
My twins are named Josephine and Vincenzo, and 6 months after they were born, the Crown Prince of Denmark had boy-girl twins and names them Josephine and Vincent. Which just seems unreal, like what are the odds?! But at least we named ours first!
I always loved the name Charlotte, but it was struck from the list by the popularity of sex and the city (to add insult to injury that Charlotte was a fictional graduate from my college, also irritating).
My half brother’s name is the same. As my maternal grandfathers and my mum was so mad when she found out because it meant that my siblings and I would never use it for our kids (not likely any more any way as it turns out my sisters girl is a miracle baby and it looks like my brother is also struggling in the fertility department). It is a name I like, so there is always a possibility but I loathe the female version .