By Prairie Anonymous

Why you would be having an MRI?

During the D&C for my 2nd miscarriage the doctor noted that I have a uterine septum. My new doctor booked me an appointment to have Magnetic Resonance Imaging (MRI) of my uterus to get a better look at the septum. Please not this is my description of my Canadian experience.

What to expect

Upon arrival, I filled out a long list of yes/no questions relating to my health history. I had a couple of follow up conversations with the nurse resulting from my answers.

My jacket, valuables, etc were put into a locker. Other patients who attended the appointment with a support person left their jacket and valuables with that person in the waiting room.

I was then asked to change into hospital pants because my jeans had a zipper, but was allowed to keep my cotton shirt on, with bra removed. They told me that if you want to wear your own clothes, you can usually do so, just make sure your clothes do not contain any metal. You need to remove all metal jewelry, so do yourself a favour and leave everything metal at home.

I am not claustrophobic and I was not sedated. I saw other patients who were quite anxious, a normal reaction, and they were receiving intravenous sedation.

When it was my turn, I was taken to the procedure room, strapped into the machine with something over my abdomen. An emergency call button was placed in my hand and I was instructed to squeeze it to stop the procedure at any point. The technician explained that I would be there for about 30 mins and they would be in the room next door and would be providing me instructions through a speaker set up. I was then given hearing protection headphones and I was moved horizontally into the MRI. Both ends of the machine were open and I was able to kind of see the room’s light and some of the space around me.

During the MRI I was instructed to remain very still. Throughout the process there was rhythmic thumping that stopped and started. During the breathing exercises I was told to breath in, breath out, take a short breath in and hold it for about 20 seconds. The technician would instruct me when I could continue to breath normally. The instructions to do this were clearly explained to me through by the technician through the sound system.

As for the MRI itself, I actually enjoyed it. I found the machine & experience relaxing (sort of like acupuncture or tanning beds). I feel like I almost slept for most of it. It was very zen. I know this is probably not the typical experience, but it was how I experienced it.

After about 20 minutes they interrupted my session and the technician and a nurse came into the room. The tech informed me that he had showed my scans/images to a doctor who recommended they use an injectable dye to get a better picture. This was recommended to prevent a second visit and procedure with the injection. The nurse found my best vein, inserted an iv and injected some red stuff and sent me back into the machine for another round of scans.

At the conclusion I was informed that my doctor will have the results in 5-10 days.

My discharge was uneventful. I was taken back to where my clothes were, I changed, collected my valuables and jacket from the locker and I left. I was there for about 90 mins. If I had been sedated I would have required someone to drive for me after the procedure.

Personal tips

One little recommendation. During the MRI you can see your feet. I was wearing a pair of socks that were a gift and it was strangely comforting. I recommend asking your partner, husband or a good friend to go out and buy you a special pair of socks for the MRI. It will keep you connected to them through the procedure and give you something positive to focus on.

Apologies to the inquisitive woman at the grocery store who asked about my children today.

Woman: Cute! Twins! Do twins run in your family?

Me: No, they’re fertility treatment twins.

Woman: Oh (striken expression as if I just told her that I stole the children from a blind woman). Well, you’re lucky that you didn’t end up with six kids.

Me: That would have been great. I would have loved six kids. But my fertility clinic–like many fertility clinics–has a rule about how many eggs you can use. Their limit is three.

Stunned silence as the woman contemplates how she entered into an uncomfortable conversation about fertility clinics with a crazy lady. Let me help you out–don’t ask the questions if you’re not prepared for any answer. Especially when I’m cranky because I left my purse at home and had to double back for my wallet with a child kicking the back of my seat.

How many people answer honestly when strangers ask nosy questions that lead to infertility answers? The “oh-does-your-child-look-like-your-spouse” questions (um…no…he’s adopted/donor egg or sperm). The “don’t-you-want-to-have-another-one” questions. The “do-twins-run-in-your-family” questions.

Reading blogs can be confusing if you don’t know the commonly used abbreviations. Here is a list (and add more in the comments section below) of ones utilized by the American infertility/pg loss/adoption community (non-Americans sometimes have different terms such as EPU–egg pick up instead of ER–egg retrieval).

2WW–two week wait (post ovulation until beta)
AD–adoptive parent
AF–aunt flo (your period)
AH–assisted hatching
AI–artificial insemination (an old name for IUIs. No longer commonly used)
AO–anovulation
ART–assisted reproductive technologies
BBS–boobs
BBT–basal body temperature
BCP–birth control pills
BD–baby dancing (having sex. More commonly used on bulletin boards instead of blogs)
BF–biological father
BFN–big fat negative
BFP–big fat positive
BG–blood glucose
BH–braxton-hicks contractions
BIL–brother in law
BMom–biological mother
BP–biological parents
BP–blood pressure
B/W–blood work
CBAVD–congenital bilateral absence of vas deferens
CCAA–china center for adoption affairs
CCCT–clomid challenge test
CD–cycle day
CM–cervical mucous
D&C–dilation and curettage
DD–dear daughter
DE–donor egg (sometimes also donor embryo)
D&E–dilation and evacuation
DH–dear husband
DHS–department of homeland security
DI–donor insemination
DIUI–IUI with donor sperm
DIVF–usually IVF with donor eggs but could be any donor gametes
DOR–date of referral
DOT–date of travel
DP–dear partner
DP3DT–days past three day transfer
DP5DT–days past five day transfer
DPO–days past ovulation
DS–dear son
DTC–dossier to china (or DTV, DTE–dossier to…)
DW–dear wife
Dx–diagnosis
E2–estrogen level
EDD–estimated due date
Endo–endometriosis
ER–egg retrieval
ET–embryo transfer
EWCM–egg white cervical mucous
FC–foster care
FET–frozen embryo transfer
FF–fertility friend (online charting service)
FIL–father in law
FRED or FRER–first response early detection (peestick)
FSH–follicle stimulating hormone
GnRH–gonadotropin-releasing hormone
GS–gestational surrogate/surrogacy
hCG–human chorionic gonadotropin
HPT–home pregnancy test (also called a peestick)
HS–home study
HSG–hysterosalpingogram
HTH–hope that helps
ICSI–intracytoplasmic sperm injection
IF–infertility
IF–intended father (surrogacy)
IM–intramuscular
IM–intended mother (surrogacy)
INS–immigration and naturalization
IP–intended parents (surrogacy)
IUGR–intrauterine growth restriction
IUI–intrauterine insemination
IVF–in vitro fertilization
IVIG–intravenous immunoglobulin
Lap–laparoscopy
LH–luteinizing hormone
LMP–last menstrual period
LP–luteal phase
LPD–luteal phase defect
M/C–miscarriage
MF–male factor
MIL–mother in law
O–ovulate (or O’ing)
OB/GYN–obstetrician/gynecologist
OHSS–ovarian hyperstimulation syndrome
OPK–ovulation predictor kit
P4–progesterone
PAP–potential or prospective adoptive parents
PCOS–polycystic ovarian syndrome
Peestick–home pregnancy test
PG-pregnant
PGD–preimplantation genetic diagnosis
PID–pelvic inflammatory disease
PIO–progesterone in oil
POAS–pee on a stick (take a pregnancy test)
POF–premature ovarian failure
PROM–premature rupture of membranes
PUPO–pregnant until proven otherwise
RE–reproductive endocrinologist
RI–reproductive immunologist
RPL–recurrent pregnancy loss
Rx–prescription
SA–semen analysis
S/B–stillbirth
SFC or SFBC–single father by choice
SHG–sonohysterogram
SIF–secondary infertility
SIL–sister in law
SMC or SMBC–single mother by choice
SPC or SPBC–single parent by choice
TCOYF–taking charge of your fertility (book by Toni Weschler)
Temp–taking BBT
TS–traditional surrogate/surrogacy
TSH–thyroid stimulating hormone
TTC–trying to conceive
Tx–treatment
U/S–ultrasound
UTI–urinary tract infection
UU–unicornate uterus
VBAC–vaginal birth after cesarean
xfer–transfer

This post originally appeared on Weebles Wobblog on December 7, 2007.
Reprinted with permission from Lori.

When we decided to go the domestic infant adoption route, we were fortunate that through no real calculated effort, we happened to fall into an excellent adoption agency. And by “excellent,” I mean two specific things:

• An excellent agency counsels hopeful adoptive parent on two fronts: (1) processing grief to heal the wounds of infertility, and (2) living in open adoption.
• An excellent agency is squeaky-clean in its dealings with both hopeful adoptive parents and expectant parents. Ethics toward expectant parents may not be high on your agency checklist at the front end of an adoption, but make no mistake. It is in your long term interest, and that of your future child, to make sure that your child’s firstparents are also treated ethically.

So plan on doing some research once you hone in on an agency or two. Ask to talk to past customers of adoption services (adoptive parents) and consumers of pregnancy counseling services (firstparents).

20 Questions: A Girlfriend’s Guide to Choosing an Adoption Agency
Needless to say, choosing an adoption agency is one of the biggest decisions you face, because you need to go where your child will be. My advice is to follow both your head and your heart.

How? First, your head. Research the agency by interviewing its counselors and asking to speak with both adoptive parents and firstparents they have served.

Ask the agency

• What’s the shortest wait you’ve had? What made it so short?
• What’s the longest wait? Why do you think this couple had such a long wait? What did you do to help them?
• What is a typical wait?
• How many couples do you have actively waiting at one time?
• How many placements did you have last year?
• How do expectant parents find you?
• What is your counseling approach for expectant parents? (Information on parenting should be easily available to people coming in for pregnancy counseling. The agency should never push, but rather provide information and support.)
• How often do expectant parents decide to parent after being matched with adoptive parents?
• At what stage of the pregnancy do you suggest expectant parents choose adoptive parents? (Many professionals suggest not entering a match until at least 7 months into the pregnancy. Expectant parents go through a lot of ups and downs, and you don’t want to be riding that roller coaster for more than 2 months.)
• Please explain your fee schedule. (A large portion — up to 1/3 of the total — should be due only after placement.)

Ask adoptive parents

• How long was your wait?
• What kind of grief counseling did the agency offer? (Expect some support in healing from infertility so you are ready to parent whole-heartedly).
• How active was your agency?
• What kind of after-adoption support is available? (Look for an agency that provides post-adoption counseling or parenting classes as part of the supervision process).
• What kind of relationship do you have now with your child’s first family?

Ask firstparents

• How did you come by your decision to make an adoption plan? (A good agency will let the expectant parents take the lead and not push them into ANY option. This is crucial to reducing the risk of expectant parents changing their minds. The decision has to be freely made, and I would run fast from an agency that puts pressure on expectant parents to “give up” a baby.)
• To what degree did you feel supported by the agency?
• If you had a friend who was pregnant and needed help deciding what to do, would you recommend this agency?
• How did you hear about the agency?
• What kind of relationship do you have now with your child’s family?

Look for healthy situations where both parties feel well-served and well-represented by an agency. A good agency will make the adoption process collaborative (with the child as the focus), rather than adversarial (where one side’s loss is the other’s gain).

After you gather the facts, let your heart weigh in on the decision. Sit quietly and find out what your intuition tells you. If you have a “feeling” about an agency, go with that feeling. Adoption — like parenting — is a very intuitive process. Adopting with your head and heart will prepare you to parent with your head and heart.