I found as I was writing about Beorn last week that I struggled with what to call him.

Not his name, obviously, but “pet” felt a little too… owner-ish. He lived in my house. I paid for all of his care and upkeep, but in the end, I didn’t own him. I couldn’t force him to interact with me or give affection back. He wasn’t an object. Calling him a pet felt wrong.

I’m not really a “fur baby” sort of person, though he was definitely my baby. I would swaddle him and carry him around the house like a baby and tell him he was my baby. He was an enormous priority, though there was a difference between Beorn and the twins. Calling him my fur baby felt wrong, too.

His big personality transcended the impersonal “animal,” and he was so much more than your run-of-the-mill “guinea pig.” I wish there was a better term out there to describe our relationship or how he fit into our family and what I lost. Because that’s the sentence I’ve had trouble completing, “I’ve lost my…” My heart? My comfort? My emotional support? My soft, sweet boy?

I thought this was really good advice, so I’m passing it along in case it resonates with you, too. It speaks to artists, but I think everyone — regardless of your job or if you don’t have a job — enters a scarcity mindset from time to time.

She defines the scarcity mindset:

Scarcity mindset is the state of believing that what you want is in limited supply. That you will never have enough of that thing.

You could have this feeling around money, time, connections, status, or security. If you experience scarcity around connection, you feel lonely. If you experience scarcity around status, you feel undervalued.

It’s any time that you feel anxious that you don’t have enough or you’re somehow behind or you’ll never catch up to peers, and it almost always accompanies a comparison because without that benchmark, how can your brain know how you stack up?

She doesn’t just provide the definition. She goes into the three things that happen when you’re in a scarcity mindset and ways to tackle it. I’ve been using her recommendation to set a timer, do the task, and walk away. If you reached your goal (e.g., write for a half hour or send three job applications), then it doesn’t matter how anyone else does. You’ve reached your own finish line.

There is a lot of scarcity messaging out there, keeping that idea that you don’t have enough or you’re getting behind front and center in our brains. Find the source and remove it. It’s not that it’s not true — things are pretty bad out there right now — but you don’t need to keep hearing the message.

Not sure what #MicroblogMondays is? Read the inaugural post which explains the idea and how you can participate too.

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I adore this story about how Penn and Teller did a magic trick, and it’s a really good reminder that most things you’re impressed with require an extraordinary amount of time to accomplish.

It’s two-fold: The hours put in learning sleight of hand to get the correct card chosen and the months put in having the grass regrow.

But mostly, I love Teller’s quote: “Sometimes magic is just someone spending more time on something than anyone else might reasonably expect.” It’s something to keep in mind whenever making a comparison.

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Are you also doing #MicroblogMondays? Add your link below. The list will be open until Tuesday morning. Link to the post itself, not your blog URL. (Don’t know what that means? Please read the three rules on this post to understand the difference between a permalink to a post and a blog’s main URL.) Only personal blogs can be added to the list. I will remove any posts connected to businesses or sponsored posts.

As I say every month, I’m shamelessly stealing this idea from Jessica Lahey. She has a recurring monthly date where she reviews all the books she reads that month. Book reviews are important for authors, and I want to get better at doing this.

So. I’m going to review them here and also online, but I’m going to do it a little differently. I’m only going to review the stuff I really liked. I don’t see a reason to spend my time writing about something I didn’t love; it’s just using up more of my energy. So only positive reviews.

These are the books I liked (or mostly liked) from March.

You Are Fatally Invited (Ande Pliego): I have found you the perfect beach read. This is a solid thriller about a writing retreat turned murder retreat. Each chapter is short enough that you’ll keep saying to yourself, “Just one more.” Not all of the crimes seem murder-worthy, but I could suspend those thoughts and go along for the ride. Looking forward to this author’s next book.

The Rachel Incident (Caroline O’Donoghue): This is one of those books that I kept seeing on other people’s lists, but I didn’t know anything about it. It was an exceptional book. Amazing and stunning and emotional. You will remember being in your twenties and trying to figure out the world. This book transports you.

Famous Last Words (Gillian McAllister): I always enjoy her books, though this one had a few inconsistencies that threw me off (character’s hands are tied in one scene, and we’re told they’re not tied in another, etc) because you think you’re being clever noticing and then they’re just editing oversights. It moves quickly and would make a great beach read.

Claire, Darling (Callie Kazumi): It has another name outside the US (Cuckoo), which is perhaps too large a clue? It was super engaging writing with a not very engaging plot. I kept wanting to pick it up, but there were zero surprises in the end. Which may be your cup of tea – a lite thriller.

All the Other Mothers Hate Me (Sarah Harman): While I don’t know if I’d ever want to spend actual time with the main characters — Florence or Dylan — they were fun to encounter on the page. It’s a super fast read and a good distraction from doomscrolling. It reminded me a little bit of a Bella Mackie book.

What did you read last month?

I’ve always been a solve-the-pain-of-losing-a-pet-by-adding-another-pet person. If you read back, you can see that we got Truman soon after Cozy, Linus soon after Truman, and Beorn soon after Linus. My heart hurts so much that my instinct is always to run and place that love in a new receptacle rather than sit with the pain.

But this time, I need to sit with the pain until the kids come home so they can be part of the decision-making process. That is probably a healthier way to process emotions. I still spend a lot of time thinking about guinea pigs and watching Beorn videos, but we will have a few weeks before we add to our family again.

We use Chewy because it’s convenient — pigs go through a lot of bedding — but we’ve become brand loyalists after our experience with Beorn. I commented that I had just opened a package of his medical feed a few hours before he died, and the Wolvog told me that if I let Chewy know, they would refund perishables. So Josh let Chewy know, and they refunded the order and sent flowers and a note. Who does that? A business that lives by its values and puts animals first.

I’m grateful to everyone who commented here or on Facebook. I have been very lonely this week. It helps to know other people are thinking about him, too.

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Stop procrastinating. Go make your backups. Don’t have regrets.

Seriously. Stop what you’re doing for a moment. It will take you fifteen minutes, tops. But you will have peace of mind for days and days. It’s the gift to yourself that keeps on giving.

As always, add any new thoughts to the Friday Backup post and peruse new comments to find out about methods, plug-ins, and devices that help you quickly back up your data and accounts.

And now the blogs…

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But first, second, helpings of the posts that appeared in the open comment thread last week. To read the description before clicking over, please return to the open thread:

• “18 Years in 18 Words” (Bereaved and Blessed)

Okay, now my choices this week.

Swistle opens her comment section for “restorative complaining.” She explains, “This, combined with the significant knee-recovery setback, combined with the absolutely execrable U.S. government and its daily doses of excrement, has led me into a bit of a Misery Era.” Misery Era pretty accurate describes this time, and sometimes you need to vent it out.

All and Sundry gives an update that includes the loss of her cat. I think when you lose a pet, your eye is drawn to anyone else mentioning they lost a pet. But this is also a lovely post about hospice and the importance of being there at an end. This part stayed with me all week: “I miss her so much and I miss how we would love her together as a family, you know what I mean if you have family pets. The love you shower onto the pets is also shared love, maybe a way to show love among each other that’s easier when you’re a teenager or even grumpy-feeling spouses. I love you Callie is also I love us.” Go over and read the whole post.

I also marked Bereaved and Blessed’s 18 years in 18 words. Congratulations on reaching this enormous milestone.

Lastly, No Kidding in NZ is slowing down (not stopping) blogging because she has a lot on her plate at the moment. She explains, “Because there’s a lot going on in my head at the moment, and I don’t want to write it all down for public consumption. And it’s hard thinking of topics to write about when my every thought is about another issue.” Sending her a lot of love.

The roundup to the Roundup: I miss my sweet pig. Your weekly backup nudge. And lots of great posts to read. So what did you find this week? Please use a permalink to the blog post (written between April 11 – April 18) and not the blog’s main URL. Not understanding why I’m asking you what you found this week. Read the original open thread post here.