#Microblog Monday 503: Happy/Unhappy
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There are things that can’t make you happy if you have them but can make you unhappy if you don’t have them. For instance, food. If you are sad, being handed food will not make you happy. But if you are happy, being hungry and not having food will make you sad.
Or maybe unhappiness or sadness aren’t the correct terms. It can cause distress.
Not profound, but it helped me make sense of why it is impossible to make someone happy. The things that cause distress in their absence are all good things (food, water, shelter, comfortable temperatures, skills), and the things that cause happiness in their absence are all negative things (anger, hate, lack of safety). Contemplating how to generate happiness this morning.
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4 comments
I think about that every time someone says “money doesn’t buy happiness.” Because it doesn’t, but the lack of money certainly can make everything miserable.
I dunno, in the Midwest, food = love, so being given a casserole or chocolate chip cookies in a time of distress can definitely ease pain. Not entirely, but it signals that the emotional burden is shared.
Huh, fascinating. I agree with the first comment that “money doesn’t buy happiness” … but it sure makes life less stressful. I feel like having basic needs met is important, but happiness can come even when things are crappy in that regard. I often feel that “happy” and “sad” are not great words for describing feelings/states of being.
I agree with the comments above. I think a lot of the things you write about are the basic physical needs for survival in the hierarchy of needs. The difference between needs and wants, for example. I also think that happiness is over-rated. Often the pursuit of it can bring a satisfaction, a contentment that is, on the other hand, under-rated. I think we need to allow ourselves to feel sad, but not to wallow in it. After sadness or unhappiness and a good cry, it is possible to consciously turn our thoughts towards other things. For me, practicing gratitude really helps.